Sex is more than physical; it's powerful and connected to who you are.
In a world that tells us it's only physical, experience tells us something different regarding sex. An inappropriate touch to severe sexual abuse stays with people their whole lives and carries a darkness that touches the soul. Of life's regrets, more often than not, sexual history is often a factor for many. Emotional, physical and mental health is impacted by sexual activity.
The Apostle Paul elevates sex beyond stereotypes (it's a raw appetite; just do it. It's dirty; do it only if you have to) and states sex is more than physical its mystically tied to who we are, powerful and beautiful. Therefore take care with it and enjoy it in the most secure relationship you can find, marriage.
Everyone wants an intimate marriage; secure, safe and free of comparisons. The road to an intimate marriage is through purity. Paul's wise counsel (1 Cor 6: 12-20) is to take sex seriously. For the Christian, understand you belong to Christ; purchased with a price and not your own.
We can follow through on Paul's wise counsel in 3 ways.
- For the married: Understand that sex is powerful (1 Cor 6: 12). It's no mistake that Paul begins this section of Scripture stating, "Everything is lawful for me," but not everything is beneficial. "Everything is lawful for me," but I will not let myself be dominated by anything." Safe guard the intimacy of your marriage against all forms of immorality (including pornography—in all forms including soft). Be wise - you can't un-see what you've seen. Intimacy in marriage mean not rivals (even in the mind) when you go to bed with your spouse. The road to intimacy is through purity (even of thought).
- For the parent: Talk to your children; remind them they are unique and special and this includes their bodies. Cultivate conversational relationships from the start. According to Joe MCIlhaney and Freda Bush (Authors of Girls Uncovered: What America's Sexual Culture Does to Young Women) "Scientific surveys clearly reveal that more girls say their parents influence their behavior more than peers, media or other sources." 43% of parents believe others influence their children more than they do on matters of sex; only 18% of teens believe this. Parents, you are your child's most important and best influence.
- For the single (divorced, widowed, widower - everyone): Paul's counsel and the abundant evidence of human experience tells you wait to have sex until you are in a marriage relationship. Protect your mind and body. Don't be fooled; when Paul writes to flee immorality, he means all forms of sexual activity not just intercourse.
WHY? Wisdom is going through life taking on as few scars as possible and leaving as few scars as possible on others. Sex is more than physical. Sex is powerful and connected to who you are. If not for your own sake; don't give others cause for regrets in their lives. Live wisely and experience fewer regrets for yourself and others. True love isn't about just you. True love protects those we say we love; this includes sexually.
How about those who read this and say "I've been sexually active and that boat has already sailed for me." Let's take a page from Paul's counsel in 1 Corinthians 6: 18, flee (avoid) immorality. In other words, stop what you're doing. While that sounds easy; it isn't. This is where the a healthy church family comes in; share your situation with someone you trust and ask they walk with you in your decision to live for Christ. At Lakeside, we are not about shame, throwing rocks or condemnation. We're about healing, hope and new life. Cultivate healthy relationships in which you will be encouraged to live for Jesus. We need each other's help in living for Jesus.
If you read this and have experienced sexual abuse and/or harassment and are living with pain, shame and darkness—come into the light. Share your experience with your Pastor or a trusted friend. Again, at Lakeside we believe in redemption, healing and hope. We will walk with you and if we can't help you we help you to find the help you need. You are not alone and if you were abused sexually, it is not your fault. We're here to help you. We understand sex is more than physical.
Christ is our identity and who we are; from this durable core we inform all areas of our lives.
Sex is more than physical. Sex is powerful and connected to who we are. #whoareyou